Monday, June 13, 2011

10 reasons why Stuart Broad should be dropped

* The statistics for starters don't lie. Broad is not a strike bowler. He has a bowling average of 36 after more than 3 years of Test cricket at a strike rate of a wicket every 67 balls. He has taken only 3 five wicket hauls ever, and none in the past 2 years. He has not taken more than 2 wickets in an innings for 6 Test matches

* To make matters worse, despite the obvious, England keep giving him the new ball. Anderson, Tremlett and even Finn look like natural new ball bowlers and take the wickets to prove it

* He is clearly over rated by the England team management and not least by himself

* He's the most feminine looking sportsman ever seen. Is he unifying the game of cricket in terms of gender?

* He's nearly 25 but still looks like he's never shaved in his pampered life

* To compensate for all this he puts on a big tough guy act but he just looks like a snarly little pussy cat

* Nasser Hussain is his biggest fan and a similar angsty pratty twerp

* Getting technical now, he doesn't take wickets because his bowling doesn't have a good SHAPE to it. Genuine Test fast bowlers curve the ball into and then away from the batsmen as their stock delivery

* This lack of shape is easily explained by simple eyesight when you see him bowl - his bowling action is completely flawed, he falls away with his front arm and doesn't have a good wrist position on release

* He is predictable to batsmen because he bangs it in too short with that gunbarrel straight "shape"

* He is not quick, 135kph tops - all of Anderson, Tremlett, Finn and even Bresnan are quicker bowlers by the speed gun alone, not even taking into account the awkward swing and bounce these superior bowlers generate

* He is just so full of himself prancing around the field and acting as though he has a divine right to be in the team, as the golden boy. This has no doubt been fuelled by his own team mates, as illustrated when Graeme Swann stuck up for him in the paper with some ego stroking drivel

* Oh and of course Steven Finn despite being only 21 has already proven to be a vastly better bowler (and Bresnan and Onions and probably several others, don't let's start down that line). Finn has just become the youngest Englishman ever to 50 Test wickets, at a great modern day average of 26. And he's about to be dropped for the management favourite to protect their investment. Only in England eh (or maybe in Australia too I hear:)

Ok ok that's more than 10 reasons, and I can easily think of even more. It is just annoying that he will be picked yet again and persevered with when he is to this and I'm sure other judge's eyes not a genuine bowler! Isn't that one of the main requirements of playing Test cricket as a bowler?

Me mom could bowl more people out than this lass.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Fortune or Farce?

And so it was, shortly after lunch today, we had the undisputed best bowler in the world today (Steyn) in top rhythm bowling beautiful booming outswingers to the best batsman of all time (Tendulkar of course). With the new ball, on perhaps the best cricket ground in the world (Newlands), in the deciding Test between the top two teams in the world, in a crucial match situation in the first innings. Does cricket get any hotter than this?

What a shame it was marred by poor umpiring and vastly poorer administration by the corrupt powers that be that is the Indian cricket board, to not universally adopt the proven umpire decision review system technology for their Test matches. Tendulkar was palpably caught behind just after lunch and given not out, a decision that may well have denied South Africa their rightful series victory by costing them many runs, just as had happened in the previous Test in Durban.

Am I being naive to bleat about unfairness? Or can it be true that umpiring decisions are in fact more rigged than player performances? India need to stop being a bunch of sulking Luddite pussies and move forward with the times and adopt the damn technology like everybody else. Perhaps their stubborn reluctance to tow the line is only fitting for a third world country growing too big for its boots.